Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Lessons of the Bamboo

One of the best tales I have read is that of the bamboo and the grass. Although the bamboo is part of the grass family, many of us cannot look at a bamboo and not think of it as some kind of a tree, weird as it is.

And so it was told that once there was a man who planted bamboo and grass on some land. After only a few days, the grass grew and within the next few weeks and months, the land became verdant. The man was pleased with th grass but quite disappointed with the bamboo which remained the shrub that it was when it was planted. It grew a little over the year but not enough to impress the man. The grass remained vibrant over the years. Then one day, the man would notice that the bamboo has become sturdy and has grown poles so tall and lush with green leaves. The story would conclude that all those time that the bamboo remained a bushy plant, it was actually growing its roots. As soon as it gained ground firmly embedded itself to the earth, there it was ..... a beautiful, sturdy, presence on the a green land. The man was finally happy to see both the grass and the bamboo fully grown on his land.

I have always loved bamboo for its nonchalant charm. The rustling leaves when the wind blows remind me of happier times when life was simple yet fuller. Seeing one allows me to travel back in time when summer was spent with my grandparents at this rustic place where I felt everything was so laid back.... As a child, I didn't want spending time in my mother's hometown but it was to be part of tradition and our escape from the scorching heat of the city..... probably my mother's respite from baby sitting her three grown children. My grandparents had no TV, stereo, or fancy food that we had anytime in the city. Everything we had to eat was food cooked by my grandmother. I would long for the hotdogs and other processed food as well as the sodas and ice cream. We had no toys but played games under the sunny or moonlit skies. I simply hated the laidbackness of provincial life.

But now, I have been given new eyes to view those childhood scenes...... and how I long to go back and once again taste my grandma's steaming rice and simple viand as my cousins and I gathered on her long dining table awaiting our hot meal........ Food was short but we were happy and contented, even competing for more portions of her simple fare. There, we would play hide-and-seek under the big starry skies. The dogs would be our running mates. We were reckless and would jump straight to the river from the bridge whenever we want to take off the heat from our sweaty bodies. Fruits were in abundance and accessible. We would climb trees not simply to get its fruits but just for the thrill of it. I got bruised, cut, hit my head, broke a bone, actually fell from a tree but nothing could deter us from enjoying those simple pleasures. Ah, those were the days..... and if I could only move back the hands of time.......

The bamboo is a gentle reminder of a time of my life long gone.......

About a year ago, our eternally evolving pocket garden was overhauled because of a drainage problem..... My insatiable desire to shake things up in the house came with the renovation of a pocket garden in addition to the drainage work. There were small patches of landscaping work. On two corners of the garden, I wanted bamboo plants or tree or grass....whatever..... My landscaper did as I wished.....

Like in the story, it took about a year until the bamboo would grow. In time, the bamboo would have sturdy poles and leafy growth all over, mostly on top. It actually reached my bedroom window that I would be able to touch its leaves. But there is one problem, only the bamboo on the right corner has really grown how it is supposed to be. The bamboo at the left side remained to be small...sure it grew some leaves but that was about it.

I was bewildered. Those bamboo, although planted apart, exist in similar conditions, and are provided the same care. Why would one grow and the other left behind? I don't understand..... and perhaps I never will...... Months passed and the bamboo that grew continued to develop sprouts which would later become poles. We would be cutting some of the poles to prevent the bamboo from spreading out further in that corner. Still, the other bamboo remained little.... that I would forget about it.......Until recently when my eyes were drawn to the spot where the little bamboo is..... I noticed that it has grown compared to how it was a year ago. The leaves are beginning to come out too.... Could this be the start of its full blooming?

I don't know.....

Nothing is set out or laid out for us. There are no perfect moments....... just opportunities to seize at any given time. And some people and maybe even things can find that opportunity to make things happen. It can be through a gentle nudging or a violent shaking; some provocation or a sudden realization imploring us to act swiftly to seize the moment.

And so it is with my tiny bamboo. My constant rambling must have shaken the earth that holds the tiny bamboo.... Just yesterday, I saw a sprout and what could be the beginning of a pole....

And my bamboo might have finally came to seize its moment... It is its time.... and like any other occurrences in my life, I would learn from it.....

I should not be comparing...... I was thinking these two bamboo are living in similar conditions and expected to get the same outcomes....it is not to be..... How can I missed that even siblings raised in the same home would each have their own unique personalities..... I should just learn to appreciate each one's uniqueness. Besides, we end up frustrated when we fail to get what we expected.

In all things, patience is a virtue. I should keep in mind that answers to our most fervent wishes come at the right time in accordance with God's perfect plan..... I should not be questioning that.

From now on, I will let my tiny bamboo draw into its own strength to deliver its promise..... no rush. I will be patiently waiting for that moment when your sturdy pole with your leafy top will be the view that would greet me as I clear my mind in solitude from my bedroom window.

My bamboo will a constant reminder that hope springs eternal.......
Related Posts:
Bamboo Fiber and Bamboo Bedding
The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter
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Tuesday, February 23, 2010

February 15 - 21, 2010: Make or Break


With not one but two major holidays, rather special days, falling on a weekend, how could I have the appetite to go to work the following day? I had to drag myself to work on that Monday....

This week, I figured I could lay low a bit. It was a loaded weekend, two holidays remember....... besides, it's term break......... most of the leeches are out there somewhere......... a good thing really..... there's peace and solemnity......... Just perfect for listening to some good music.........And I am ready to grab my headset and lose myself.... while working of course.........

This is a critical time for me as well. Work beckons with test papers and requirements to check and evaluate. There are too many distractions and I couldn't set my mind to work. It seems that last week's episode is repeating itself. I couldn't get my momentum. I want to flagellate myself for this inactivity. Days passed and nothing substantive has been done. On the very last day of the week which is also my deadline in submitting the grades, I crammed preparing the grades of my students. It's make or break for my students as well as for me. I have to make it to school today to submit the grade. It might have worked well for my students as I didn't have to review the grades too much. Unlike in the past, when i had to sleep over it before i make the final decision. I can feel the tension on my neck and back when I printed the file just before I left the office to go to the school..........history repeated itself.

I made it to school but the staff have already gone when i got there. I texted our administrative head about my dilemma. She called the building guard and gave instruction so that I could leave the file and the books I borrowed with him.

I had to wait for ED coming from her school. I decided to take a bite at the Mini Stop in front of the school and gave way to my craving. Soon enough, ED arrived and we went to the shuttle terminal. She was starving too and I told her about the new food kiosk at the terminal serving tapsilog atbp which has recently been added to my craving list. My kids somehow took after me in having simple pleasures. Recently, I introduced them to Burger Machine which now boasts of several types of burgers as a product innovation. But some of the old products we enjoyed in the past like the roast beef sandwich is no longer in its menu. But their new burgers with the different sauces are good and filling.

With both of us satiated, we headed home. As I rested my head on my soft pillow, I could almost dream about how my weekend should turn out......... and I can tell it's going to be one restful weekend for me........

On Sunday, I went to see one of my beloved pups join her new family....... it was a bittersweet parting..... I do know she's in good hands.....
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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

February 8 - 14, 2010: Finding Love on Chinese New Year


This is a week anticipated by lovers and the Chinese. Valentine's day and the Chinese New Year both fall on February 14. Is it purely coincidental that these two major events would fall on the same day, a Sunday? Or was it written in the stars that on this day, lovers and people from the Sino race would celebrate in jubilation?

It happens to be finals week in school too. The students would labor hard to make it past this term......... Would they or will we see each other again next term? I sure would love to see them again but not repeat the same things I taught. That would mean I failed. In my earlier years as a teacher, I used to take pride in the fact that a student's future hinges on my mood when I reckon who is supposed to make it and who did not get it. I mellowed a lot over the years. Experiences have taught me to use the heart more than the head in most cases. That seem to work both ways. The students are happier. I am less stressed out too.

Preparing the final exams proved to be the hurdle. I am so distracted and disrupted by this cool music site I discovered recently that work suffers. Suffice it to say that I crammed big time preparing the exams for my students. At one point, I just had the exams freshly out of my printer as I was about to go to school from the office.... bad, bad, bad! I used to be ready with the answer key to the exams before I give the exams to my students. This time, I was lucky to have finished drafting the questions. I got to review them as I was giving the test and I had to correct some entries........ really bad!

Addiction (to music this time) is again eating me up. Music soothes and heals. But it can also eat up time otherwise devoted to productive pursuits. Like my other 'vices', this will be contained soon....

It was supposed to be TGIF but here I was at school watching over my flock. They wanted to extend the time indefinitely........ I wanted to relent. But there are limits to a man's capacity..... On their own, the students submitted their test papers to me letting me know that is the best that they can do under the circumtance. The week ended just when the last of my students reluctantly handed me her test paper. I was just happy to go home.

I had to meet up with ED who watched the musical, Rent, with her classmates at nearby RCBC Plaza. I was starving and we had to take dinner at North Park, one of the few restos still open at that hour. It's quite a surprise considering that it's a Friday before Valentine's Day.

Getting home was the only place I want to be after filling up my stomach. The travel didn't take long but it was almost 1:00 am when we got home. We actually arrived the next day, eve of two major celebrations.

Sunday is awaited by everyone. It's a red letter day literally..... which is the color of love and the lucky color for the Chinese people too.

To the whole of Christiandom, it's a day of obligation.

Happy Hearts' Day to lovers and all those who loved, are in loved, and are longing for love. The last category might have the most members....

GONG XI FA CAI!!!
2010 is the Year of the Tiger, also known by its formal name of Geng Yin.

Related Posts:
Chinese New Year
Online Chinese Astrology
The History of Valentine

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Thursday, February 11, 2010

We Are What We Are


Many times we find ourselves asking the question "Why are we stuck with some of the people we have in our lives?" We have them by affinity, association, or consanguinity. Certainly, life would be a lot better if they are not part of it..... Of the 6,800,000 or so people in this world, again I ask, "why, oh why, must we be stuck with them!".

Unfortunately, we don't really have a choice in some cases. So grin and bear, we must ... We have to share this world with them even if we feel that the world would be a better place without such creeps....... Some are not really creeps but just the same, they get into our nerves.

I have quite a few such associations.... and it's irritating to have these kind of people in your life particularly when they are so close to home. It can start harmlessly...... some casual conversation could actually lead to more sharing of thoughts which could be misinterpreted into 'closeness' that could lead to unsolicited advising.... which I loathe especially from people whose opinion I don't value and most especially because they are not well-meaning people. They love to know every tiny little detail of your life, nitpick, and over-analyze even the most inconsequential. They have an interpretation for anything. People with nothing better to do, do this all the time....

In a seminar on midlife crisis I attended last year, the resource person said that we will lose friends and some other people in our lives simply because we would outgrow them. I think that if I have not outgrown them, I am simply tired of their ways....and they cannot probably come to terms with that fact that they have been outgrown. They remain in the quagmire that they have always stayed in without any hope of ever getting out. They are envious, gossipy, resentful,and always on the look out for anything that can destroy people.... Some of them are supposed to be our elderly........ One such person would tell me that ED is like an elderly for being reserved and would show irritation over MS because being a kid, he was all over the place. The same person would proudly tell me that a grandchild was reassigned in the field and would be getting a raise. She added, however, that this grandchild is not used to working hard (the exact term in the vernacular is "di sanay mahirapan")...... I think the person just meant to say that since they are wealthy, the kid does not have to strive and work hard. If these are the kind of values they are teaching their youngsters, I am proud of my introverted and hyperactive kids who know the value of work and sacrificing to get what they want and certainly know that money is not everything.

Another variation to these type of people are those who want to talk about themselves painting for them a picture bigger than who they really are and catapulting themselves to a place that they think is rightfully theirs.... They like to feed on their own low self-esteem that constantly need affirmation.... They talk about their enormous wealth, travels, and latest acquisitions in front of a captive audience. There's nothing wrong with that except when that is the only thing that they can talk about. Let me tell you it's tacky and uncalled for...... Wealth is something that is best not flaunted. Flaunting wealth is evident among the so called "new money". My son has the right term for them.... boasts........ They boast to anyone, willing or unwilling, thinking that everyone is impressed by the object of their conceit.

My family is not used to this kind of cheap talks where a boast would monopolize a conversation in a captive (or is captured more apt) audience. We cannot be found in a table of suckers and victims forced to listen. Or in the unfortunate event that we find ourselves caught, we will find a way to get out of the situation as quietly as possible. Because we cannot be part of your captive (captured) audience whenever you want to boast, doesn't mean we are rude. We will stay as long as we can but not forever. Quite frankly, we don't mind nor care about the color of your fleet of vehicles or how much you reward your kids with an insane amount of money. Don't feel slighted when we leave the floor when we couldn't stand your insensitivity and rudeness for holding people captive as you brag. Don't make an issue out of it and talk about us like we wouldn't know because you pass on your concocted story to people like you who will keep on passing it to make sure it reaches us.

We are what we are.........because we are real....You're not forced to accept us for what we are, warts and all, .......... but live and for once, try letting others live in peace......

It's sad that wisdom does not necessarily come with age.... or wealth. Even with the experiences afforded by getting older, not all become wiser. Even if resources are available to improve one's mental and emotional being, some do not simply have it in them to learn the ways of the wise.

If you feel you are being alluded to by this post, you are probably right. Yes, it's you and you know who you are.... If I happen to hit a sensitive chord in you, apologies but I am not taking anything back..... If you happen to feel insulted and decide to get out of our lives..... good riddance...... It's probably for the best. Try to breathe because you are gasping for being so full of ourselves..... For once, stop living in your Nirvana and be real....
Apologies for the the anger in this post..... It's just that I have to ventilate...

Related Post:
How to Deal with Criticism and Critical People
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Indecent Proposal is Not so Indecent After All


I watched, rather rewatched, Indecent Proposal as insomnia kept me up last Friday. Appreciation for a movie always comes late. In our youth, we were probably, too naive, to understand all the emotions that go with falling in love. We, or at least I, saw the movie for what it says it is.....

One of the biggest teases in film history, this film's sensational plot finds a young wife (Demi Moore) solicited for sex by a wealthy bachelor (Robert Redford), for which the latter offers to pay a cool million bucks to her and her underachieving husband (Woody Harrelson). The two accept Redford's deal, and their marriage is ruined. The twist in the film, though, is that the sin doesn't lie with the rich guy, but rather with this unfocused, immature, equivocating couple who would do such a thing, naively believing it would get their lives on track. Director Adrian Lyne, who caused an even greater stir by filming Lolita (the one starring Jeremy Irons), thus pulls a kind of thinking person's bait and switch, promising something tawdry and then turning the story around so its focus is on a rite of passage for the estranged spouses. Still, Lyne has some peculiarly garish ideas at times: the final disposition of that million dollars is like a joke out of Monty Python. --Tom Keogh


I probably branded, Diana, Demi's character, a whore, for agreeing to have paid sex with billionaire John Gage (Robert Redford), the lothario who uses his money to buy anything, people included, to get what he wants. Robert Redford, though, makes for a fine playboy and who wouldn't be tempted..... What about David, Woody Harrelson's character, and Diana's husband..... the wimp who allowed his wife to consummate the deal of a lifetime in exchange for money to fund their dream......

As they say, experience is the best teacher.... Watching it now when I am no longer the girl that I used to be, I would say that Indecent Proposal is simply a love story . It is about a woman torn by being loved deeply by two man. It's about the husband who made the mistake of gently pushing the woman that he loves into a 'sin' that would change their lives in exchange for a dream......... When push comes to shove, he was willing to let go of his wife to give her the life that he thinks she deserves. It is about a rich man who has the world at his fingertips. While he didn't want to show it, it was clear he was so touched by his love for Diana that he was willing to give everything up including letting her go at the very end........... It's really a love story with three protagonists instead of just two.

The movie is about love, imperfect in its expression, but perfected by how the protagonists after succumbing to their weaknesses, bounced back at the end to reclaim true love, pinching our heart just enough to accept the consequences of an imperfect love.

You might want to give this movie another look this weekend. Just the right stuff to watch this Valentine's day ........ and you might have the answer for the question begging for an answer, "Would you do it for a million bucks?"
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Monday, February 8, 2010

February 1 - 7, 2010: Music and Me


I have not sat down and listened to good ole music for sometime...... like seriously listen and lose myself. I was like that in my college days.... the days when good music reigned..... I am into any genre but I especially love Jazz, Samba, Latin, R & B ......

I was into my normal routine of checking stuff in my Facebook at the office on Monday morning. I was working too on some stuff..... ssshhhh. Without much thought, I clicked on Be a Fan of 24/7 Cool and Smooth Rhythms..... Viola, I rediscovered my music.... And it's never been the same after that accidental discovery. I started playing a song I like.... Then, it kept on coming. Before I knew it, I was requesting for my own favorites.... The site administrators are so responsive to their audience. At the time of my discovery, I was using a rather short ear phones left in my drawers. For two days, I strained my neck listening to all those songs from morning till I was about to go....... while working, of course, and farming too..... I multitask, yea!

I decided to do something about it. I got myself a nice headset that Tuesday evening for my listening pleasure. I excitedly brought it to the office the following day..... and it's like ecstasy. I am back to losing myself to my music.

The site itself has steadily grown its fan base. It now boasts of being the largest growing site in facebook with more than 3,500 fans even before its monthsary. I myself promoted the site to my brother and friends. We would mingle sometimes.... stupefied by the songs that thrilled us in our youth. What's great about the site is the interaction among fellow music enthusiasts. The site is not limited to jazz but songs of different genre. The administrator on board would cater to the beat as requested by fans of the site. Requests are easily granted. I used to have all my requests granted when I first joined the site. Maybe, like a first timer winning at the Casino. But now, that a lot more fans are requesting more songs, the administrators have to make a good balance of song choices. I still get many of my requests posted.

Music soothes and inspires me..... With music, I have caught up on my writing too. I am proud to say that publishing this post before the week ends puts my blog up-to-date.... ya'y...... and I think I can make it. On the other hand, work suffers...... big time. With 24/7 CSR, I am like a kid given too much space to run around.......

Coming from school on a starry Friday night, I walked the lonely trail to my home, .... The darkness gave way to a beautiful sky light and I could almost cry.... I feel like washing my soul...

I couldn't sleep that night from the coffee my student offered me which I couldn't refused because it was bundled with munchkins. I turned on the TV... Indecent Proposal was on at HBO. It has been showing for a number of nights and I never can seem to watch it in full. That time was perfect as I couldn't sleep. I actually watched this film in my youth when Demi Moore was the natural beauty that she was and not the perfectly chiseled mannequin she is now..... It was good watching the movie again as it gives one another perspective.....

In the weekend, I would get a text message from our boss thanking me for the speech I made. Was she reading my mind or did she happen to read my post........
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Thursday, February 4, 2010

January 25 - 31, 2010: All Within the Family


I was looking forward with anticipation to this week because my friend V........ will be returning from her visit to her family in Canada. It's been a month. She actually extended her stay because she's been missed much. It is a very painful set-up for her and the family. She goes to Canada at most twice in a year. The longest she stays with them is about a month during the Christmas season. It's been like this for her the past two years since her family migrated to Canada.

I was both happy and sad. Happy to see her again. My social life has somehow slowed down in her absence. We live close to each other so it's easy to make plans when boredom eats us. We usually get a night cap as the week draws to a close. It's unfortunate that one of my classes falls on a Friday. So we have to do this in the middle of the week as things are heating up.

I am sad because I know she will be missed by her loved ones. I know how much she misses them. I know how painful that can be...... It's gonna hurt when she finally joins her family for good. But that is the best that can be for my friend V...... and I want her to be happy.

I was supposed to fetch her from the airport but she changed her mind at the last minute..... Always like her....... she doesn't want to bother anybody. I was actually looking for an excuse to take a leave from the office..... Didn't work..... I realized, however, I have classes on that day and I don't take time off from school. There is too much to miss in a three and a half hour class. Perhaps, it's providential or I would be cramming next week.....

I reconnected with some family members I lost contact with for the past years. It's good to reestablish contact and hear from them again. I feel inclined to reconnect and trace my roots as time goes by.....

I was looking forward to the weekend because we are having a special family gathering at home. My brother's family is coming over. I made arrangement with my youngest brother to bring his family too. The family gathering also served as an impromptu birthday celebation for hubby who would be celebrating his birthday on Sunday. There have been so many things that happened the past few months and this reunion is meaningful to each one of us. During the Christmas season, my children were asking me if my brother and his family were coming for our traditonal reunion. I wasn't sure...... Recent events have scarred this family. I blame it on the frailties of human nature.

This weekend, we were trying to heal wounds we have inflicted on ourselves. Some wounds, however, would take time healing.....

In what was to be an important weekend for our family, our water pump would experience trouble and need rehabilitation..... We're in serious trouble (a.k.a. deep shit) this weekend.....

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Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Healthiest Foods on Earth


Note: To vindicate myself, having written earlier a post on my current affinity with unhealthy comfort food, let me share this article I got from an email. It was lifted from Live Health Club. Some of the food are everyday fare. Glad to know that my favorite versatile food for all seasons, egg, is there : ) It's good to know it doesn't take much to eat healthy.

1. Berries
All berries are low in sugar and high in fiber. Blueberries have been shown to increase memory in lab studies, and raspberries and strawberries are loaded with ellagic acid, a powerful antioxidant that seems to have some anti-cancer properties, according to the American Cancer Society.

2. Beans
Beans are extremely high in fiber, which helps to control weight, prevent or manage diabetes and blood sugar, and may help prevent colon cancer and protect against heart disease. The National Institute of Medicine recommends 25-38 grams of fiber a day. The average American gets only 4-11 grams. One cup of beans provides 11-17 grams.

3. Nuts
Some of the largest and most important long-term studies of diet and health have shown that eating nuts several times a week is consistent with a risk of heart attack and heart disease that is 30%-50% lower than the general population. Just one ounce of nuts-almonds, macadamia, Brazil , walnuts, pecans-eaten three to five times a week seems to be the magic number.

4. Wild Salmon
Fish is the ultimate anti-aging food. Cold-water fatty fish like wild salmon, sardines, mackerel and herring contain omega-3 fats that protect the brain and the heart, improve mood, and lower blood pressure and triglycerides.

5. Raw Milk
Raw, organic milk nearly always comes from grass-fed cows and contains high levels of cancer-fighting CLA (conjugated linolenic acid) as well as a rich assortment of vitamins, minerals and beneficial bacteria (like Lactobacillus acidophilus)

6. Grass-Fed Meat
Meat from grass-fed cows has a much different fat profile than ordinary supermarket meat: high in omega-3s, lower in potentially harmful omega-6s and loaded with CLA, a kind of fat known for its anti-cancer activity. A superb source of protein and vitamin B12, it's also missing the antibiotics, steroids and hormones found in the meat that comes from feedlot farms.

7. Eggs
Considered by many to be nature's most perfect food, the egg is high in protein and relatively low in calories. The yolk contains choline, one of the most important nutrients for the brain, as well as lutein and xeazanthin, two critical nutrients for eye health. Brassica Vegetables Cabbage, Brussels sprouts, broccoli and kale all contain plant compounds called indoles that help reduce the risk of cancer. In addition to a stunning range of vitamins and minerals, they also contain sulforaphane, an important plant chemical that helps the body detoxify health-damaging chemicals.

8. Apples
Not only do they keep the doctor away, they also appear to do the same for lung cancer, diabetes and asthma. An apple contains five grams of fiber and a rich blend of nutrients including the bone-building vitamin K and the anti-inflammatory nutrient quercetin. And there's no better way to control your appetite than an apple eaten about half an hour before a big meal.

9. Onions and Garlic
In an impressive number of published studies, the consumption of onions and garlic has demonstrated protective effects against stomach, prostate and esophageal cancer. Along with broccoli, tea and apples, onions and garlic are among a select group of foods found to reduce mortality from heart disease by 20%.

10. Pomegranate Juice
Called "a natural Viagra" by researchers at Tel Aviv University , pomegranate juice is loaded with antioxidants. Studies show it can reduce blood pressure and plaque in the arteries. New research indicates it also slows the progression of tumors.. Four to eight ounces a day is highly recommended.

11. Green Tea
Though all teas are great for you, green tea has a unique profile of plant chemicals that have anti-cancer activity. It's now fairly established that green tea may help prevent the following types of cancers in humans: bladder, colon, esophagus, pancreas, rectum and stomach. If that's not enough, it also appears to help with weight control.


There you have it. The choice is yours.
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